WorkStyle Tip - Future Gratitude Letter

January is the perfect time to write your Future Gratitude Letter. Regular WorkStyle by design readers will be familiar with this intentioning process, but in case you have forgotten, or you are a newer reader of WorkStyle by design, here is the process:

A Future Gratitude Letter is a letter written to yourself a year in advance, describing all the things that you're grateful for. It includes Who you've become and What you now have or don't have. Be careful not to include anything that feels like a 'should' or a 'striving' goal. The key is in the energy. If your energy feels uplifted when you think about the things you're grateful for in a year's time, then it's probably coming from Creating Energy. If you feel fear or some version thereof, then it's probably coming from Striving Energy. It's a wonderful process, very revealing and enlightening, especially from the start of a new year. The creative tension and intention has begun its journey.

The fun piece is how you interact with the contents of that letter in the next 12 months.

Just today I read my own Future Gratitude Letter, and although some of the names and locations have changed, the underlying message remains the same…'BE PRESENT'. The Who I am becoming showed up even though some of the Whats were not as I anticipated.

I urge you to take 30 minutes to write your own 2009 Future Gratitude Letter.

Spotlight on... Andi Pert

My name is Andi Pert and I am a facilitator and executive coach who chooses to work as a portfolio consultant. I have my own company, Life NRG (pronounced energy), which is about Purpose, Passions and Performance. I coach individuals and facilitate small groups of women enabling them to thrive and flourish, manage their energy, establish purpose and passion, enhance performance, and manage transition and change. Annually, I facilitate a 'Women’s Well-being Retreat - Creating rituals for refocus, reconnection and rejuvenation'.

I am also a facilitator and coach with Xplore for Success – an organisation that runs Career Resiliency programs for professional women in large corporate organisations and for TalkPoint, an organization that brings together very senior HR Leaders to create a shared learning community.

How would you define your WorkStyle? (work + lifestyle = WorkStyle®)
My WorkStyle is a blend of being a career woman working part-time, a wife of a CEO attending many corporate functions during the week and on the weekends and most importantly, being a mum to two teenage children, who keep me aware of my need to learn, grow, laugh and be flexible. I am also the daughter of two wonderful parents who continue to support me and my family so that we can live the WorkStyle we chose.

I love working as a portfolio consultant with different organisations as it enables me to work with the best in my field, providing stimulation and challenge and also allowing me flexibility in my work life. For example I take almost 10 weeks annual leave a year to share most of the school holidays with the family.

How did you discover your WorkStyle?
My WorkStyle has been a work in progress. There has been lots of trial and error and ongoing learning about what works and what doesn’t work for me and the family. It is something that I have to work at, place my attention on and regularly review how I am going. A great indicator for me is my energy levels. Prior to working in the way I do now, I used to facilitate 3-day residential leadership programs and I would be exhausted by the time I got home… which meant I had no energy left for the people I love.

Has it changed over the last few years? Why?
Absolutely! At the beginning of each year I set my theme for the year and my priorities and goals. In 2007, it was the 'Year of the Rock', meaning that it was important that I provided stability for my family during this year. Both of my children were changing schools and my husband changed roles and I felt it was important for me to be around after school to check in on Cassie and Mitch’s days and to be there at night to simply be with my husband. I still continued with my work but I tended to work school hours and cut back on my interstate travel.

In 2008, it has been my 'Year of Learning and Growth, I have had a wonderful year attending courses and conferences in Positive Psychology and Coaching and furthering my love of learning. I have facilitated and coached in Dubai and I have also attended a retreat at Gwinganna, to learn about how the large scale retreats are conducted. How blissful! I have been extremely busy with wonderful clients and it has been extremely rewarding. This year has been a lot about me being at my best!

In 2009, it will be my 'Year of Boundaries' -setting them and sticking to them with support of family, friends and colleagues. I feel like I have been on a Pendulum over the last few years, swinging one way when I chose to not work as much in my year of the rock and then this year the pendulum has swung to the opposite side as I have worked more than I had planned over the last few months. That’s why 2009 needs to swing back to the centre and find a ‘sweet spot’ between work and life outside of work.

What has been your biggest shift?
I think my biggest shift has been working on my own self-limiting beliefs and truly believing in myself. One of the biggest shifts occurred when I was doing a course with Tal Ben Shahar, a Positive Psych lecturer from Harvard and he introduced us to an exercise about giving yourself permission to be human. I had wanted to conduct my Women’s retreats for over four years and had prepared all of the materials but something always seemed to stop me. While doing this exercise with Tal, I realised what was stopping me was me! At the completion of the course, I set a date for the first Women’s Wellbeing Retreat, sent out invitations and the first retreat was conducted six weeks later and was a wonderful success.

This is a poem that was written by Suzy Fraser, one of the first participants to attend the retreat:

Who's the person I am today
I'm asking the question and what can I say ?
Who's in the mirror when I'm looking at me
Is my life really how I want it to be ?
I'm asking myself what's really key
To make it happen and set my dreams free
Yes, there are things in my life that I have to do
But I've learnt its important not to lose the real you.
So, let go of your fears and embrace the unknown
Follow the ideas that the weekend has sown
Embrace your dreams and follow your heart
Introducing new rituals is only the start
Take that step towards the life you desire
Live at a level that is deeper and higher
But carry with you always that symbol so new
The heart shaped pebble and a knowledge of you.

The retreat was a turning point for me. I love getting out of bed each morning, doing my meditation practice, taking the dog for a walk, getting the kids ready and driving in to the city to work with women and make a positive difference in their lives. I believe that I have found my purpose in life. I am passionate and energised about what I do and I am able to use my strengths every day.

What one WorkStyle practice has had the most impact? Why?
There are actually many practices, but the most important is my daily meditation practice. It nurtures and renews my energy on a daily basis and allows me to do what I need to do and be who I chose to be.

What are or have been the biggest issues for you around WorkStyle?
The biggest issue for me around my WorkStyle is managing my varied roles and competing priorities in my life. It is always a challenge when your partner has a senior high profile role, you have children, family and friends and a career of your own. I will get back to you at the end of this year to let you know how the 'Year of Boundaries' goes!

What tips would you give others to improve their WorkStyle?
Regularly take time out for you - to think about what is important to you, to set your plans for the future and to review how you are going. Find ways to use your strengths every day and monitor your energy levels…are you energised or drained by the people you spend time with and the activities you do… your energy levels are a great indicator of whether you are playing to your strengths. Establish rituals that you complete on a daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly and yearly basis to support you to be the person that you want to be and remember be easy on yourself – you are probably pretty perfect just the way you are!!!

Start Building Your Personal Reserves Now!

At merrymentality we talk about the energy-choice relationship. Our unique approach of discovering and designing your WorkStyle creates an ascending spiral of continuous choice and sustainable energy. With more energy we have more choice; with more choice we have more energy - the ascending spiral. One way to step into this spiral is to build Reserves. Having a Reserve means having more than you need; a Super Reserve is having much more than you need in every area of your life. With high Reserves choices become easier and automatic. Life becomes more natural and more authentic. With high Reserves you have more choice, and we know that leads to more energy. Without Reserves it is difficult to be truly you as you are focussed on getting your needs met, instead of really choosing what fulfils you. With high Reserves you can sustainably be yourself.

The good news is that the process of building Reserves is as worthwhile as the result so there is no reason to delay... Start to build your reserves now!

There are many areas of life in which to build Reserves: money, opportunity, wisdom, integrity, love... At merrymentality we initially focus on the 3 biggies for leaders and emerging leaders: TIME, SPACE and ENERGY.

TIME - what would you do with an hour or two of time each day, beyond resting, just for you? Many people can't answer this question as it has never occurred to them to have a spare hour (or two). Imagine what you could do... spend time on your hobby; play with the kids; walk in the park; read a novel (vs a business book); meditate; exercise... the list is endless. Start to create a reserve of time by simply imagining what you would do with it!

SPACE - what would you do with the room to think and be, without pressure, obligation or adrenaline? Imagine having the space to simply 'be'. For some of us this is a scary thought. We are so used to living as 'human doings' instead of 'human beings'. Where can you start to create more space in your life?

ENERGY - what would you do with increased sustainable energy? This is a question that both Warwick and I ask at the beginning of many of our keynote presentations. Most people think we are mad even suggesting you can have increased sustainable energy! Yet imagine having enough oomph to get through the day consistently and rest well each night. There are many ways to increase your sustainable (that is vital and natural) energy (versus flight or fight / adrenaline). What one eating habit will you lose? What one eating habit will you take on? How will you incorporate drinking more water in your day? Is it really that hard to go to bed an extra 15 minutes earlier? What exercise do you love doing? What is stopping you? merrymentality clients know that energy comes down to three key things: eat, sleep and exercise. What will you maintain or change to increase your sustainable energy?

The benefits of having Reserves are many. Here are just a few for you to be inspired by:

• basic fears are eliminated
• you have freedom from worries
• life becomes effortless
• you become more attractive
• you gain space to grow and be at peace
• you have ease and comfort in emergencies

Reserves are just one of the 19 lessons in the Personal Foundation program that merrymentality offers clients. Contact Belinda at belinda@merrymentality.com.au if you are interested in undertaking a 26 week Personal Foundation program. It might just make 2009 Your Best Year Ever!

Alternatively, you can simply take the 100 point Reserve Checklist - or if you are ready, the 100 point Super Reserve Checklist. Email wbd@merrymentality.com.au with Reserves or Super Reserves in the subject line and you will be emailed the relevant Checklist.

Update from Belinda

The Christmas period once again showed me the power of reserves. Just before Christmas I was due to have a small, simple, half-day procedure and be home that evening from the day clinic. In reality I was hospitalised for 10 days, being discharged on Boxing Day (the day after 25 December). It was not fun and a pretty tough time for me. Yet.. the power of Reserves kicked in. My friends and colleagues all rallied round. The phone, email and sms were busily sharing my situation so that I could be supported. I want to say a huge thank you to a number of my friends, colleagues and clients for making my room in the hospital look like a florist and for all the support, time, love, care and concern. To Mark, Don, Lindy, Belinda R, YT, Craig, Diana, Marion, Paula, Fiona C, Fiona T, Heather-Jane, Edwina, Nadja, Sally, Belinda H, Sam... a HUGE thank you.

Speaking of friends...You read above that both Warwick and I often start our keynote presentations with the question 'Who here wants more sustainable energy?'. The great news is that Warwick has been doing some keynotes for merrymentality over the past few months. He is a great speaker - full of energy. So if you have an after lunch slot in your conference (sales kickoff, workshop, team building event, etc...) and want a funny and energetic speaker (he now says that he loves marriage so much he has done it twice!!) do let me know and I'll put you in touch. Of course I do keynotes too (in early December I undertook a very confronting, but rewarding 2 day 'Corporate Performance' course with NIDA - the National Institute of Dramatic Art) so feel free to request either Warwick or myself. Simply email wbd@merrymentality.com.au with your function speaker requirement and let's see what we can do.